The no routine routine

There are often weeks (sometimes months and even worse, sometimes years) when it's all you can do to keep your head about water. One thing happens, then another and then another. Some of the things that happen are good things but that doesn't make them any less complicating.

It's kind of like building a house of blocks. It all goes along very well - you have a plan, a routine, you stick to it, and then someone - or something - comes along and adds another block. And then someone else does the same. Or someone takes one away.

And then your blocks collapse, all is chaos, and you have no idea what to do next.

You can manage one of those things happening, sometimes even two, but the third and fourth and fifth things completely throw you. You lose whatever rhythm you had going - you know, work and writing and family and friends and... All those other things that we either have to do or love to do have toppled whatever control system or routine you had in place.

My life is like this ALL of the time. Every day or week or month or year I try for a new routine, one that will work right through the addition or subtraction of blocks. It works for a few days, sometimes even a month, and then that darn block too many topples my routine. Or that darn invisible hand (of fate? of chaos? of life?) takes away the block that was the cornerstone of my routine.

I've realized that the only routine that works for me is to have no routine. Oh, I'm going to try to have things that I accomplish every day - but those things are going to be done is very very very small blocks so no matter what happens, I can still do them. Every week is going to be different and, although I can create a new routine each week, that's a whole lot of work for a short period of time.

So this week I'm creating a whole new system for organizing my life. I'm calling it the no routine routine. There are a few things - writing, friends, family, work - that have to into my routine but I'm going to be flexible about all of them. If I have to write in half blocks, that's what I'm going to do. But I AM going to write every day. If I have to see my friends for breakfast instead of dinner and wine, that's what I'm going to do. If I have to exercise - ewwwwww - at 6:30 in the morning, that's what I'm going to do.

It's going to work. I know it.

To do lists - good or bad?

So far I've been an opponent of to-do lists, because:

1. 1. I'm quite convinced that I can remember all of the things I need to do without any help - I mean, I have a great memory. Or at least I think I did.
3. 2. This one is odd because I'm a great believer - in all other ways - about the rule that time spent in organization saves time in the end. But I don't feel that way about to-do lists - somehow that time spent getting organized - writing my to-do list - doesn't strike me as saving time.

3. I think (somewhere deep inside where I'm pretty darn good at ignoring it) I really don't want to know exactly how much I need to do. It'll just panic me.

4. Mostly, though, I hate being a failure. When I do write to-do lists, I'm happily marking things off for the first few days and then I move on to something else and never get the last things marked off.

But this week, I started to panic because I didn't have a list and I have a very complicated schedule starting now. I have a lovely new man in my life, I have a new part-time job, I have a technical writing job that is heating up to supernova, I have started going to the gym three times a week, I have my blog and my Witchy Chick blogs and my website to keep up to date, I have writing (oh, do I have writing) to do. I have friends who I love and want to spend time with. I may even want to take a vacation occasionally.

So, as you can tell, I have a pile of things to do and, because the surface of my desk isn't that big, I have to put things away to pick up at a later date. And all those things started to shriek at the same time.

Do me! Do me! No, no, it's my turn! You've ignored me forever and now you're going to be in serious trouble if you don't deal with me!

You get the picture. So yesterday, for what feels like the hundredth time (and is probably only the twentieth) I typed out a to do list. I put in dates on the items that had deadlines - that was almost all of them. I added in things that didn't have to be done at any particular time but should have been dealt with weeks (sometimes months) ago. Of course I don't have everything on my list - it's just a first shot at it.

My plan is to update the list every week. But I am happily deleting items as I finish them and I'm hoping that, this time, I can stick with the list. I'm hoping that it will make me more productive. I'm hoping that it will help me sleep (because I won't be worrying about what I have to do next). I'm hoping that I won't feel like a failure because, once again, I gave up on the list after a few days.

Do you have to do lists? Do they help?

Kate